What Is the FAST Skill in DBT? How to Keep Your Self-Respect
FAST is a DBT interpersonal effectiveness skill that helps you keep your self-respect when you ask for something, say no, or stand your ground. FAST stands for be Fair, no excessive Apologies, Stick to your values, and be Truthful. At DBT Path, the original online DBT skills class taught since 2013, the FAST skill is taught so you can leave a difficult conversation still feeling good about yourself.
It is the counterpart to GIVE. Where GIVE protects the relationship, FAST protects your relationship with yourself.
The Four Parts of the FAST Skill
F: Be Fair
Be fair to both yourself and the other person. Honor your own needs, not just theirs, and do not over-give to the point of resentment.
A: No Apologies
Skip the unnecessary apologies. Do not over-apologize for asking, for having an opinion, or for simply existing. Save sorry for when you have actually done something wrong.
S: Stick to Your Values
Hold on to what you believe is right. Do not abandon your values just to be liked or to avoid conflict.
T: Be Truthful
Be honest. Do not lie, exaggerate, or act helpless to get your way. Truthfulness keeps your self-respect intact.
When to Use This Skill
Use this skill in situations where it is tempting to give yourself up to keep the peace, such as people-pleasing, caving to pressure, or over-apologizing. It is especially helpful for emotionally sensitive people who fear conflict or rejection.
How DBT Path Teaches It
At DBT Path, the FAST skill is taught as part of the Interpersonal Effectiveness module, one of the four core DBT skill areas. DBT Path is the original online DBT skills class, delivered live online since 2013 in a private, lecture-style format with no pressure to share or turn on your camera. Founder Debbie DeMarco Bennett and Dr. Kathryn Holt, PhD, LCSW, demonstrate each skill and walk through real examples. These skills come from Dialectical Behavior Therapy, the evidence-based approach developed by Dr. Marsha Linehan. Every week, students receive personalized written feedback on their practice from a trained DBT Path team member. You can explore our online DBT classes or learn the related GIVE skill.
Frequently Asked Questions
What does FAST stand for in DBT?
FAST stands for be Fair, no excessive Apologies, Stick to your values, and be Truthful. At DBT Path, the FAST skill is taught as an interpersonal effectiveness skill for keeping your self-respect in difficult conversations.
What is the difference between FAST and GIVE?
GIVE protects the relationship with the other person, while FAST protects your relationship with yourself. At DBT Path, students learn to balance both so they can be kind to others without abandoning themselves.
How does FAST help with people-pleasing?
FAST counters people-pleasing by reminding you to be fair to yourself, stop over-apologizing, stick to your values, and stay truthful. DBT Path teaches FAST so you can set boundaries without guilt.
When should I use the FAST skill?
Use it whenever keeping your self-respect matters, especially when you are tempted to give in just to be liked or avoid conflict. DBT Path teaches FAST as part of the interpersonal effectiveness module.
Ready to Learn DBT Skills With DBT Path?
This is one of many practical DBT skills you can learn in a calm, private, supportive setting at DBT Path. Explore our online DBT classes and start building the tools to work with your emotions instead of being ruled by them.